Badger did a lovely post summarizing and expanding on yesterday’s lovely post, and it dovetailed nicely with something that I’ve written, so here it goes. Badger says that Game is part of your over-all attraction palette, which I won’t argue with. I’ll go him one further, however: properly practiced, Game is a post-industrial male mating strategy. So is true love (“Twu Wuv “– more on this in a minute.) So, actually, is feminism, albeit a poor and shortsighted one dependent upon Twu Wuv for the carrot, while providing plenty of feminist stick on the backside.
Okay, not the most pleasant mental image, but . . .
There are plenty of bright young people in college who are currently attempting to map out their futures, a daunting prospect in this economic climate. They have an academic strategy, a college-selection strategy, a career strategy, and perhaps even the rudiments of an investment strategy. The most anal-retentive amongst them have a strategy to cover virtually any contingency that might arise. But despite all this attention poured into strategizing and planning, very few of them have even the vaguest idea about a Mating or Reproduction strategy.
There’s a simple explanation for that: they’re relying on Twu Wuv ™ (“True Love”).
Twu Wuv is the driving force behind the plot of any romance novel or soap opera. It is so ingrained in our culture that it is inescapable. The idea that there is one man or one woman out there for you that will give you complete fulfillment as a human being, to be the other half of your soul, whose every word is golden in your ear and every touch a caress. It’s the cultural representation of Oneitis, and it has become the dominant form of mating in the West. Women believe in Twu Wuv. So do men. Every one of us grew up in the cultural context that “the One” was out there, without even having the benefit of an Oracle.
Twu Wuv is dangerous, because it justifies and rationalizes just about anything in its pursuit: infidelity, falsehood, betrayal, theft, murder, deceit, you name it, someone has done it in the name of Love. I’m not knocking that – people doing stupid shit for love can be highly entertaining. It can also be highly destructive. Twu Wuv really “came of age” as a mating strategy in the 20th century, after haunting the twilight of the culture for centuries, and was epitomized in the dramatic abdication of the King of England, who gave up incredible power and wealth to marry for love. Once that happened, Twu Wuv was the industry standard of mating strategies.
Note that last part. And the results of all the others. Marriage is not incidental to Twu Wuv, it’s the climactic endpoint. The meeting, the flirtation, the rising passion, the doubts and reservations that are quickly overcome, the savage passion of love’s release . . . yadda yadda yadda. And then you get married. HEA (Happily Ever After). The End.
Instead of relying on social customs, parents, or a matchmaker to pursue your mating strategy on your behalf, you depended, misty-eyed, on Fate. Kismet. Destiny. The fickle fortunes of the gods or the random nature of the universe, take your pick, rarely is Twu Wuv sought. It just happens, magically, when you least expect it.
In theory, at least.
Laying aside the overt emphasis on the courtship, and hence an over-importance on the role of dopamine and oxytocin and vasopressin in your relationship, not to mention the utter lack of modeling for a successful post-courtship relationship (“Happily Ever After” is about as helpful as Twu Wuv gets), as a mating strategy Twu Wuv is a chaotic and haphazard way to manage your reproductive affairs by any measure. Depending on fate or fortune for your future family is just . . . foolish.
But that’s the industry standard we’re stuck with. And it damn sure didn’t vanish with feminism. Among other ills, feminism ruthlessly demanded the dismantling of the Agricultural Age marriage 1.0, and then didn’t have anything better to replace it with than Twu Wuv. As pragmatic and practical as the modern feminist career woman is, when it comes to her mating strategy she’s depending upon Cupid’s errant arrow to ensure her genetic destiny and emotional fulfillment. The carousel-riding 20s are often an aimless attempt at finding The One via the expedient of hooking up. It’s like each woman is trying to find the Magic Penis that her vagina will recognize, the one attached to the billionaire.
Now, any regular reader of the Manosphere familiar with Game will read through the above and have a much different perspective on Twu Wuv. That’s because Game is another mating strategy, and one that’s counter to – yet occasionally complementary with – Twu Wuv. Twu Wuv is an essentially female-centric strategy, since the emphasis and focus is on the flirtation and courtship stage where attractive behaviors and presentations are a woman’s forte. Game is a male-focused strategy, one in which the flirtation and courtship stage are also primary, but in which the sexual, not the emotional, component of the relationship is stressed. Twu Wuv seeks Happily Ever After. (Basic) Game seeks Pump And Dump.
That might seem appalling to a lot of women, a hopelessly cynical approach to a subject that should be left up to gauzy Fate. That Game denies Happily Ever After, because Game supports masculine interests and values, not feminine ones, seems axiomatic. (Let me be specific: we’re talking about SINGLE Game, here; Married Game is a different topic). But the two are not mutually exclusive. Masculine values include: respect, sex, and a lack of drama. Feminine values, as exemplified by Twu Wuv, emphasize devotion, romance, and drama. You can see why the two might be at odds. But they can (ultimately) be rectified.
The problem is that feminism broke Twu Wuv as a functioning mating strategy when they broke marriage and went crazy with the hypergamy. Twu Wuv only works if you have the Happily Ever After, and marriage under a feminist regime denies you that whether you are male or female. Moving from the heady romance of Twu Wuv up to the Happy Day when she gets her party, feminism substituted Fair and Co-Equal, Non-Dominating Partnerships for Happily Ever After. But you can’t have passion and a Co-Equal, Non-Dominating Partnership. And you need passion for Happily Ever After to work.
So what evolved was the Betacization process, in which a new-made, feminist-influence wife, once she realized that being married is actually hard work, unglamorous, and yet she was still expected to have sex with the same dude for the rest of her life and no one would pay her any more attention (except maybe her husband) until she had a baby. Whether or not she thought she could buy that Happily Ever After with a baby or not, she eventually did realize that marriage is hard work – at least hers is. And since she’s not Happily Ever After, then rationally (through the auspices of the hamster wheel) the obvious problem isn’t with her, it’s with the poor dump chump she married instead of The One.
The flip side to that is that men didn’t see Happily Ever After either – instead of warm and willing wives willing to fuck them like pornstars, they got increasingly un-happy women whom they tried to placate with greater and greater displays of soft and fluffy Beta. And after a couple of decades of frivolous divorce, well, gosh, they stopped believing in Happily Ever After and Twu Wuv so much. Not that they knew what to do about it, but either they tried to soldier on anyway or they gave up in frustration.
But now there is Game. And Game is good . . . for dudes.
When you consider it in a biological framework, the male Body Agenda is tied up with spreading his seed far and wide. Entrusted with the sacred duty of spreading genetic diversity, the masculine sexual psychology is built around wanting to bang one pretty 20 year old after another: the Alpha dream. Settling down with one mate for a long-term pair-bond for the purpose of raising children (a progenerative marriage) is something done later in life as a reward for surviving so long. So it is not first and foremost in the masculine sexual subconscious . . . but it is there.
For women, Twu Wuv is actually not a bad reproductive strategy, pre-feminism. It’s essentially a way of weeding down potential mates through exclusionary principals until the body/subconscious recognizes a superior father for her children via the expedient of damp panties and a glazed expression . . . and a willingness to do just about anything for Twu Wuv. Once a mate is selected and vetted, his interest in her secured, then a permanent pair-bond for a highly secure and fruitful progenerative marriage can be established. Happily Ever After.
When feminism violated the industry standard mating strategy with hypergamy, and set the stage for the EPL divorce, it was only natural – if not evolutionarily certain – that men would adapt a new mating strategy. Thus Game was born with its male-centric objectives. It might not have all the pleasant cultural associations of Twu Wuv, but you cannot fault its efficiency.
Game essentially exploits Twu Wuv. Hidden within the romance and passion is the undeniable Alpha energy a woman is innately attracted to, but rarely puts that way. Twu Wuv requires a Prince Charming, that is, a strong Alpha-presenting male with the promise of equally-strong pair-bonding Beta traits . . . and the wisdom to know which one is which. Women tend to distill this into “tall dark and handsome” and then play it off as incidental to a man’s “emotional side”. Yet we all know what chance an overly-emotional Beta dude has if he’s short and chubby. Twu Wuv is inherently attracted to Alpha, they just don’t want to admit it. They would rather chalk it up to Fate or Chemistry or Electricity, when in fact it’s serotonin and damp panties.
Enter Game, which confuses the issue by teaching Betas and Gammas how to affect an Alpha presentation . . . and sometimes generate some authentic Alpha energy in the process. By focusing on masculine interests of sex and respect, Game encourages a man to develop his masculinity into a robust and potent thing, even if he has to fake it at first. Once he spends a year or so mastering the concepts and techniques, he can usually indulge in a wide variety of sexual partners and send them on their way without the risk of marriage or other long-term harmful consequences. Game lets him navigate around the vetting process a woman has to protect her genetic legacy, hit it and quit it. That’s not a part of Twu Wuv at all.
The beauty of Game is that it works for dudes regardless of whether your long-term goal is progenerative or recreational. Indeed, the two are not mutually exclusive. A man with Game can sample many, many vaginas before he settles on one he wants as the mother of his children – having sperm viable until you’re 70 allows us greater freedom and less pressure to mate. Along the way he can perfect his vetting process and “interview” several candidates for the job safe and secure in the knowledge that if one doesn’t work out, there’s likely another one out there who will . . . eventually. In the process he can also “disguise” the fact that he wants fatherhood and marriage by the simple expedient of acting like every other player out there until he finds something worth taking home. Game allows Dads to disguise themselves as Cads in order to determine the legitimate mating status of a woman.
Feminism has been worried about this for a long time, actually. As a mating strategy, feminism has mostly been concerned about what women don’t want: they don’t want to be oppressed, dominated, disrespected, treated as inferior partners, denigrated or abused. Of course in promoting that they encouraged women to subject the men they were in relationships with to oppression, domination, disrespect, inferiority, denigration and abuse, but they’ll never admit that (it’s our fault for not being smart enough to do what they want us to).
By tacitly pursuing the feminine strategy of Twu Wuv, while simultaneously pursuing the feminist strategy of hypergamous divorce, feminism has been a mating strategy invested in keeping men both sexually needy and afraid of their own relationships. If we don’t buy into Twu Wuv then we deny them Happily Ever After, and no woman wants that. But by invoking that cultural standard, they can often browbeat unsuspecting Betas into marriages under the auspices of Twu Wuv, usually backing it up with wild premarital sex to keep his head cloudy. Then she gets her party, and they settle down for a long, nasty declining spiral of a relationship.
But feminists have always worried that men would kind of figure that out, and so they’ve been adamant against the PUAs out there as “sexual predators” as part of their campaign to keep the Betas in line. True Alphas just don’t care about such things, but the premarital threat of such accusations allowed women to maintain sexual power, just as the postmarital threat of divorce allowed them to maintain power there. Sure, there are actual sexual predators out there, men who drug and rape or worse. All true men of good character despise them for what they are – and they are not us. But the severe social and legal penalties associated with even the suspicion of such behavior are strong enough that most Betas quake in obsequious fear at the mere suggestion. More often, they come pre-cowed by a domineering, feminist-oriented mother and a submissive, deferent or completely absent father. What great future ex-husbands they are.
What Game does is remove the stigma of being sexually aggressive for men. It promotes a robust male sexuality that is not a slave of Twu Wuv, where the ideal of MGTOW and the fungibility of women allow a dude to see his future far differently than the Blue Pill dude who feels locked into the Twu Wuv/HEA/EPL cycle, so afraid of women yet so desperate for pussy that he compromises his power to commit for a substandard model. Men naturally conflate Twu Wuv with pussy, of course, hence the Twu Wuv element of the Magic Ho-Ha.
That’s the mythic idea, promoted by every romance novel ever written, that a woman’s vagina has transformative power. All Christian Grey needs is a little of the right pussy, and BOOM! He’s skipping board meetings and sadomasochistic scenes to make cupcakes for the PTA. And since men often look to romance to try to understand the female sexual impulse – not to mention understanding his own great desire for the Magic Ho-Ha – they absorb that mythic element, as well. Of COURSE he was a changed man after she finally put out! That pussy was so good, he forgot all about being a daring bad-boy and wants to have her babies now! That’s some GOOD pussy!
For Betacized men who have used Twu Wuv as a mating strategy, the Magic Ho-Ha is the reward for the successful courtship. The sweet agony of pursuit and desire culminating in sexual fulfillment convinces him of the power of pussy, and thus enchanted he willingly submits his commitment for the promise of unimpeded access to said Magic Ho-Ha. Thanks to serotonin and dopamine and vasopressin and his own tragic lack of understanding, the poor dude thinks that after the Big Wedding Scene he gets to hit that willing and eager pussy every night for the rest of his life.
The beauty of Game, as it has evolved, is that it isn’t merely a toolset for social maneuvering and mating. Properly understood, Game gives a man context for his mating strategy and understanding of what the Red Pill ground rules are. A good understanding of Game includes knowledge of the female reproductive cycle, female social dynamics, and female reproductive biology, on top of female sexual psychology. It reveals the observable reality of the female mind to replace the highly idealized Disney version that feminism promotes.
In Twu Wuv, nobody can hear you ovulate.
In Game, dude can see you’re showing a lot more skin today, you put on make-up, and you were bitchy as hell just two weeks ago – time to strike!
In Twu Wuv, women are attracted to strong, passionate, yet self-possessed men with forceful dispositions and generous natures whom every woman desires.
In Game, women are attracted to Alpha-presenting men who display high value through calculated displays of coolness, derision, affluence, preselection and social proof.
In Twu Wuv, nothing can stand in the way of the course of love that fate has decreed.
In Game, women will rationalize just about any behavior if it furthers their goal of securing Alpha dickage.
In Twu Wuv, women are self-aware heroines whose character and values, not her outrageous good looks, have the potential to transform a man from brooding Alpha to tamed Beta (while retaining all the “good” Alpha characteristics) through the power of her love.
In Game, women are special little snowflakes who can be subtextually influenced toward granting sexual access through a successfully played Alpha presentation.
In Twu Wuv, the savage intensity of the heroic male overcomes the strong resistance the heroine musters to protect them both from the social and personal consequences of their love.
In Game, women respond to strong, dominant dudes and ultimately enjoy sexually submitting to them after a brief period of flirtation, indicators of interest, and seduction through escalation, isolation, and a good close. And it’s even easier if you’re someone Daddy wouldn’t approve of.
It Twu Wuv, the passionate demonstration of a man’s character moves a woman to see the sensitive soul within his muscular, tall, tan body.
In Game, being kind of an asshole about something gives a woman a theoretical obstacle to challenge her enough to justify dropping her panties once she thinks she understands you, which are wet following the primal display of emotional masculine energy. Poor lighting and a couple of beers help disguise the fact that you aren’t particularly tall, muscular, or tan.
In Twu Wuv, the heroine is always invested in a greater cause that demonstrates her good character and positive intentions to the world, and often that cause leads to adventures as she navigates the conflicts between her heart and her conscience.
In Game, women will seek to create drama in order to satisfy their need for sexual stimulation, often using their bullshit interests as a series of shit-tests to vet whether or not she wants to sleep with him.
Both strategies have unique perspectives on love, mating, and relationships. But Game empowers men to navigate through the rocky shoals of feminism to get to the sweet, sandy beach full of pussy in Twu Wuv land. By having an understanding of the biological and psychological context in which you are pursuing your strategy, as well as the tools to execute it, you can pursue your native masculine interest (pussy) without prematurely giving up your commitment – your “C Card”.
But first and foremost is just recognizing that you even have a mating strategy. Most dudes just don’t think of it that way – they’re focused on “Damn I need to get laid, she’s hot, throw her a line, see how drunk she is” and the next thing you know they wake up next to a naked chick “in love”. Perhaps even True Love, if she still looks half-way decent and she’s willing to do it again in the morning. By recognizing that you have a mating strategy, you can start to put forth some conscious effort on improving it. If you depend on Fate or Karma or Kismet or Cupid to hook you up with The One, you’re someone’s future ex-husband and chump.
Because, ideally, if you do want a good and successful marriage to the mother of your children, part of Advanced or Married Game entails encouraging a level of dedication, devotion and commitment on your wife’s part that is suspiciously like the behavior of a woman in the throes of Twu Wuv, living Happily Ever After. A belief or even a bold pursuit of the Twu Wuv strategy can therefore put the right woman (or at least a right woman) in the right place at the right time to meet you, and pre-prepare her for your charming and commanding self. Probably not, but that’s what she’s hoping for . . . so you might as well use it.
The Twu Wuv ideal of a strong, passionate woman entwined with a stronger, powerful man is not incompatible with the male dominance positioning implicit in Married Game. And getting her biweekly (minimum) dose of serotonin and oxytocin implied by regular Married Game shaggings will keep her panties wet, her tears dry, and her brain interested in your bad-ass dominant self in the subconscious belief that you are, indeed, Prince Charming, James Bond and Christian Grey, all rolled up into one.
"The Twu Wuv ideal of a strong, passionate woman entwined with a stronger, powerful man is not incompatible with the male dominance positioning implicit in Married Game. And getting her biweekly (minimum) dose of serotonin and oxytocin implied by regular Married Game shaggings will keep her panties wet, her tears dry, and her brain interested in your bad-ass dominant self in the subconscious belief that you are, indeed, Prince Charming, James Bond and Christian Grey, all rolled up into one."ReplyDelete
This quote describes what I'm going for exactly (and most weeks we're right there). Nice post, love the Princess Bride reference as I'm a big fan myself: http://www.averagemarrieddad.com/?p=181
You know that mention of the middle ages is my cue to chime in with a comment. "Courtly Love" was merely the product of medieval Rationalization Hamsters. The bards and minstrels, like the modern media, pushed the product and White Knights (literally) defended it.ReplyDelete
Courtly Love has been described as "a love at once illicit and morally elevating, passionate and disciplined, humiliating and exalting, human and transcendent". (Newman 1968 The Meaning of Courtly Love) Tell me that's not pure hamster. "So my dad said I had to marry this Duke, because it will keep his kinfolk from raiding our villages. He's nice enough and all, but that Sir Rodney is hawt! And even though I took vows, I didn't really mean them, and love can't be denied, besides Rodney pursued me so it's not really my fault..."
Plus ça change, n'est-ce pas?
Good post and interesting analysis. I would object to one line:ReplyDelete
Feminine values, as exemplified by Twu Wuv, emphasize devotion, romance, and drama.
At the end of every romance there is the resolution of the DRAMA! The whole romance arc is like a sexual relationship, after reaching its peak "The heroine is kidnapped by the dragon she thinks she is lost prince charming saves her" the drama is over, they can have the HEA. So its not like she want to drama all the time (although some women do need the drama in their lives) but is something that is part of the whole adventure, YMMV.
I love your vintage images...where do you get them?
I think the persistence of True Love strategy (with all respect, bastardization of English language is only funny this many times) can be attributed to the fact, that it did not require anything from men.ReplyDelete
The knight went on to defend the Tomb of Christ from the unbelievers), and than returned to claim his princess. Well, guess what - under the existing culture at that time he would have done the same even if he was as asexual as a lamppost!
The everlasting fantasy of beating up some petty crook in front of a terrified damsel? Again, a man is expected to do that regardless of sexual prospects. It's what, we men do - we police the society for appropriate and non-appropriate behavior. Or have you ever read a story, where a hero notices a crook with a knife threatening an old man, and a hero just goes "Yeah, knock yourself out fella, the old-timer ain't giving me a BJ, so I will not bother"
True Love required very little actions from the man that were aimed specifically(!) at actively pursuing your mating strategy. You did what you did in your life and it happened. Like a lot of guys expect to just do what they do and naturally stay healthy - without allocating any specific time to actually going to the doctor.
The lie, however, is in the fact that men did a lot anyway. We would think that "hey, I will go to this bar just to have some good time with my buddy Larry (whom I actually hate with a passion)" - but we would go there because we wanted to look for girls. We would become disoriented on work, at lunch or at the gym, stretching our peripheral vision.
By refusing to allocate specific time to our mating strategy - we effectively allocated most(!) of our time to it in one form or the other. The most common pitfall of time management if there ever was one.
Now Game is very specific about its goals. You don't just go to the bar to get drunk with Larry because it's Friday - you are on the prowl on your dedicated "Humpday" and Larry is your dedicated wingman. You have the plan, the resources and the deadlines defined. You are not fucking around, you are not putting in half the effort.
So, as much as I despise the idea of encouraging Puerarchy*, there is no help to admitting that Game - as a conscious mating strategy - is much more sound from the time management POW.
It's a strategy. Even a faulty strategy is usually more efficient at achieving results than simply winging it.
*...which, I believe, is a waste of a perfectly good Generation and a threat to put a grinding halt to scientific Progress
"By refusing to allocate specific time to our mating strategy - we effectively allocated most(!) of our time to it in one form or the other. The most common pitfall of time management if there ever was one."ReplyDelete
Well said. The problem is that True Love (sorry, "Twu Wuv", spelled as I did, is a de facto term-of-art amongst Romance writers. Spelling and everything. And yes, it annoyed me, too) denies that it's a "mating strategy" and even condemns those who admit to having a "mating strategy" that doesn't involve Cupid's Arrow or similar fatalistic intervention. By admitting that Game is, indeed, a mating strategy, then a dude can make a plan (even a poor one) and execute it without endless nights sarging around aimlessly, getting laid by happenstance.
Finally men are getting their balls back: http://manhood101.comReplyDelete
This article is very well stated and makes perfect sense. Thanks!ReplyDelete
Wow, fantastic blog layout! How long haveReplyDelete
you been blogging for? you make blogging look
easy. The overall look of your website is wonderful, as well as
Here is my page : Orlando contractor
Just found this blog through ROK, brilliant stuff here, and very well-written too. The analysis on the end of agricultural marriage modes, the brief ascendancy of twu wuv and then its subsequent sabotage at the hands of feminism which set up the need for Game is especially important. Will be reading more in the future.ReplyDelete
The modern media, pushed the product and White Knights the future.free online strategy games war.ReplyDelete
space strategy games.
I love your blog. This is a cool site and I wanted to post a little note to tell you, good job! Best wishes!!!ReplyDelete
I was very impressed by this post, this site has always been pleasant news. Thank you very much for such an interesting post. Keep working, great job! In my free time, I like play gameReplyDelete
slitheriounblocked.net slitherioprivateservers.com Clickerheroes2.co
It was an amazing article. Realy helpful. Allow me to introduce myself. Myself Bilal. I'm aSEO Expert Let me know if you need any help.ReplyDelete
Eminem net worth 2020: Eminem is a multi-platinum selling American rapper, producer and actor who has a net worth of $230 million. He is consistently one of the highest-paid entertainers in the world.ReplyDelete