I try to overlook most of the blatant, hate-filled misandry over there, because making fun of it would be a full-time job and I honestly have more important things to do. Hugo, in particular, is a self-loathing caricature of the "male feminist", and nearly everything that appears under his name reads like a scalding indictment of the welfare system by a Black Republican. But every now and then Hugo crosses a line, and something Jezebel's token penis says pisses me off. Chalk it up to "male rage". Today is one of those days.
The Nice Guys of OK Cupid, in which hapless Omegas and Deltas (and others) who have put up a profile on OK Cupid as self-described "nice guys" are held up to shame, ridicule, and bullying for the temerity of wanting to get laid.
I'm no stranger to harshly criticizing a dating profile or two. I don't take issue with that. What I take issue with is Hugo's screeching response:
Pathetic and infuriating in turns, the profiles selected for inclusion elicit gasps and giggles – and they raise questions as well. Is it right to mock these aggrieved and clueless young men, particularly the ones who seem less enraged than sad and bewildered at their utter lack of sexual success?
Let's stop right there. These men are, as Hugo says, aggrieved and clueless. Enraged, sad and bewildered. He calls them pathetic and infuriating (mostly because of how many of them prefer women with shaven legs, apparently). He even actually questions the morality of mocking them.
But if you think Hugo's about to show the slightest concern for his fellow men over, say, the obsequious fawning he does over his feminist handlers, you would be wrong. The rage and pain of these losers -- and Hugo doesn't hesitate to mock them as such -- is, indeed, a fair and moral talent for public bullying according to Hugo . . . because they're just dudes. And dudes don't matter. (Until they start buying firearms -- then they matter).
If that last sentence is a little disturbing, Hugo acknowledges that there is a capacity for violence within these men . . . but that shouldn't keep anyone from poking at their open psychological wounds with a stick, humiliating and badgering them until they are at the brink of sanity. Because it's for the Greater Good.
You see, Hugo, like many feminists, despises male sexuality, and deeply resent the idea that just ANY man might want to have sex with a woman. Further, as an alleged male, Hugo feels fully justified in lashing out at these sorry souls because they are, apparently, in dire need of the public humiliation he encourages to be heaped upon them. They deserve it. Why? Because Hugo doesn't believe men have a "right" to have sex.
|"NOT FOR YOU, LOSER!"|
He's technically correct, in most jurisdictions. A legal "right" is something established by law or moral code, and the "right" for a man to have sex was abolished with the liberalization of divorce laws. And while Hugo thinks it's perfectly acceptable for people to have all sorts of other rights when it comes to living in our grand post-industrial society, including the right to health care, food, shelter, etc., when it comes to something as basic as reproductive and mating rights for men, Hugo feels outraged that these losers should "expect" sex from a woman . . . just because they are Nice Guys.
Now, he doesn't for a moment stop and criticize the feminist movement for promoting the Nice Guy ideal for four decades -- that would be a lot to expect from Hugo, and it would bite the manly hands that feed him. Instead he blames the Omegas, because they have penises and want to use them . . . and they've been following the only formula that feminism has permitted the average Beta-And-Below to consider when approaching his mating strategy: Be a Nice Guy and Just Be Yourself.
Obviously, in these cases, the feminist advice didn't work out. Being a Nice Guy and Being Yourself do not actually count for jack shit in the dating universe, and Hugo admits that. Admits it? He revels in it. If a dude can't be a nice guy and get laid like feminism advised him, it's not feminism's fault. After all, that would be an attempt at accountability, and that offends feminine sensibilities. Instead, Hugo blames the Omegas. Stupid, dumb-ass, ignorant Omegas.
Hugo tempts us into thinking he might actually be considering masculinity in a vaguely positive way here:
What's on offer isn't just an opportunity to snort derisively at the socially awkward; it's a chance to talk about the very real problem of male sexual entitlement.
and it kind of got my hopes up. WHAT? A REAL discussion about "male sexual entitlement"? Or, as the Manosphere prefers to call it, "Modern Male Mating Strategy"? Even with the feminist-oriented lingo, I was tempted to believe that a real, heartfelt discussion was possible.
But the "chance to talk" Hugo is excited about is actually the chance for feminists and Deltas to lecture the Omegas (and the rest of us penis-bearing humans) about why they are just sorry sacks of shit who need to just die.
The subtext of virtually all of their profiles, the mournful and the bilious alike, is that these young men feel cheated. Raised to believe in a perverse social/sexual contract that promised access to women's bodies in exchange for rote expressions of kindness, these boys have at least begun to learn that there is no Magic Sex Fairy.
(Of course, he doesn't mention that it was feminism who promoted that "perverse social contract" to begin with, that would be "blaming the victim". But I digress)
Nice Guys of OkCupid provides an excellent opportunity to reiterate a basic truth: there is no right to have sex.
I'll even concede for the moment that poking self-admitted frustrated young men in their most sensitive psychological spots in front of millions of people isn't automatically a ticket to homicidal rage, just for the sake of argument. But as infuriating as Hugo's bullying is, he's wrong about one thing.
Yes, Virginia, there IS a Magic Sex Fairy. It's called Game. Game gets you laid.
That's what these Omegas and their clueless Beta, Gamma and Delta "losers" need to realize, and Hugo as much as tells them. But he's such a dickless asshat about it, they probably won't listen to him -- he's really trying to curry favor with his handlers, not actually help out any fellow dudes. So let me go through his rant and speak directly to these hapless "losers", my fellow men who bought into feminism's lie about how to pursue, court, and seduce women.
Gentlemen, feminism hates you, with a burning passion, and is encouraging all women to hate you, humiliate you, and lash out at you for being creepy. "Creepy" means feeling a compelling desire to have sex with someone feminism feels you shouldn't (in this case, a woman). "Creepy" is Being Yourself when Yourself doesn't cut it with whatever chick is rejecting you. "Creepy" is being a Nice Guy when, as Hugo tells us over and over again in no uncertain terms, women DO NOT respect, like, or want to fuck Nice Guys. And just so you don't misunderstand your place in Hugo's universe,
Sex with other people may be a basic human need, but unlike other needs, it can't be a basic human right.
Here Hugo is telling you directly: BEING A NICE GUY WILL NOT GET YOU LAID. AND YOU ARE A SORRY SACK OF SHIT IF YOU CANNOT GET LAID. THEREFORE, BEING A NICE GUY MAKES YOU A SORRY SACK OF SHIT. AND NAIVELY EXPECTING YOUR NICENESS TO TRANSLATE INTO ANY FEMALE INTIMATE COMPANIONSHIP MAKES YOU NOT JUST A FOOL, BUT A LEGITIMATE TARGET FOR HUMILIATION AND REVILEMENT, EVEN TO THE POINT OF BREAKAGE.
Because you are a dude. And under feminism dudes don't count.
Of course, that's assuming that the Sexual Market Place is made up only of non-for-profit pussies. And it's not. Especially not in this economy. For every hapless Omega Nice Guy with a job and an erection, there's likely a hooker out there who is more than happy to take his trade. Hugo doesn't want you to know that, Gentlemen, or else you might actually get pussy, stop being Nice Guys, and stop posting piss-poor profiles on OK Cupid. Hugo doesn't want that to happen. He wants you to KEEP being pathetic Nice Guys and proving his point: under feminism it's okay to castigate men for their sexuality without regard to the consequences.
But he doesn't mention prostitution, because that's not "legitimate" pussy. But the fact is, it's easier than ever for a dude to order in for the evening with a variety of friendly and courteous vendors who are more than happy to trade their affections, gag reflexes, and muscular control for financial remuneration Hell, most of them won't hate you nearly as much as the women who reject you after locking you perpetually in the friendzone -- they're even inclined to be sympathetic. Whores are in the business of making guys feel good, and the last thing they want you to feel when they leave is that they hate you. Feminists, on the other hand, want that to be the absolute first thing that you feel. If you are an ugly dude with no money, feminists want to make it absolutely clear just how eternally unfuckable you are . . . and how DARE you consider yourself worthy of any vagina on the planet?
Luckily, not all women think this way. Hookers don't. Hookers think you're fuckable. They can even hand you an exact metric of how fuckable you are. Hookers don't want to keep you in the friendzone, they want to keep you a regular client. They don't do that by making you feel like shit. They want to fuck you.
You poor, pathetic Omegas should consider that fact carefully. Tired of being a celibate and frustrated Nice Guy? There's one certain way to end it: Using the services of a prostitute makes you visibly exempt from the "Nice Guy" category. So even if you don't have a RIGHT to get laid, by simply stepping out of the fiction of being a Nice Guy, any dude with a couple of hundred bucks can get his freak on, thanks to Craigslist and the internet. Why humiliate yourself with scorn and rejection -- and then take the chance of finding your profile on some humiliating website where you can be held up to ridicule by everyone who happens across it -- when you can just stay in, figure out which hooker you want to sample this week, and make the call? Hugo's tacit endorsement of the cynical use of prostitutes is revealing.
But being a Nice Guy? As Hugo demonstrates, women DESPISE THAT. So, again, for the poor fellows who found themselves on Nice Guys of OK Cupid?
Stop being Nice Guys.
Hugo has given you permission to let your inner asshole shine. Hugo doesn't consider sex to be one of the "necessities for survival", and he openly scorns you for wanting it -- needing it -- as much as you do. He tells you that "the hideous and clueless" should be denied sex on general principal -- after all who wants to sleep with the hideous and clueless (note: in case you missed it, that's you.)
See what being a Nice Guy got you labeled by feminism? Hideous and clueless.
NGOKC reminds us just how many young men are outraged at this reality that attractiveness, charm, and fuckability are not and never can be equally distributed.
First, note the understated tone of gleeful smugness at your predicament -- this is how all feminists feel about you gentlemen, always. If you smell the faint aroma of irony in Hugo's words, then consider it from the other side: if a dude came out and trashed a whole category of women for their romantic aspirations, they'd be labeled a misogyinst scumbag who hated women, not an "enlightened scion of male feminism". Hugo can say what he does and treat you the way he is because he and his feminist sisters actively hate you and your desire to have sex, and they have constructed the narrative in such a way that they can bash you with impunity simply because you are male. And dudes don't count.
But again, Hugo isn't wrong. He's merely describing a reality of the Sexual Market Place, even though feminists HATE IT when we use such a term for the interplay of males and females seeking to mate and reproduce. As nasty and bullying (but only for The Greater Good) as Hugo feels about you, he isn't wrong. He's just kind of a misandrous asshole about it, making the whole thing your fault. If you're just joining us, get used to it. Feminists will say just about anything to escape accountability for what they say and do.
But a less insulting way to state Hugo's point is: Being a Nice Guy does not make up for physical, social, or structural shortcomings in the Sexual Market Place, no matter what feminism has falsely informed you.
THAT'S the golden nugget you should take away from this: feminism's answer to the mating dilemma of "what can a dude do to get laid?", the Nice Guy/Be Yourself strategy, is a BULLSHIT MEME. It's openly false, and it has been promoted by feminism because it helps weed out the "losers" from their own mating decisions -- any pretense at idealism is them just blowing smoke in your face.
If a dude is dumb enough to buy into the Nice Guy/Be Yourself strategy, then he's too dumb for them to fuck. And if he has to resort to being a Nice Guy in order to try to get laid, then he's clearly too ugly or creepy to fuck. Only real dicks get laid. Nice Guys are just there to hold purses while it happens.
You, oh Nice Guys of OK Cupid, are what feminists resort to when they need to feel better about themselves. No matter how much of a loser they, personally, might be in the dating realm, at least they aren't you. As long as there is a loser like you to reject, then feminists don't have to face their own woeful inadequacies in the realm of mating.
That's just how they think, gentlemen. And as much rage as you feel about having been lied to like that, you need to put it away. Rage does not get you laid very often. Perhaps only slightly more than being a Nice Guy. It does little or nothing to make up for your social shortcomings, and it isn't going to improve the effectiveness of your strategy.
GAME makes up for the physical, social and structural shortcomings in the Sexual Market Place. GAME gets you laid. Just about anyone, even you. And you don't even have to kiss anyone's ass or listen to their boring crap to do it.
Back to Hugo, where he rationalizes bullying, public humiliation and mean-spirited social ostracization of you Omega gentlemen, even though he knows you might be unstable, because -- again -- it's for The Greater Good:
But in the case of Nice Guys of OkCupid, disdain isn't rooted in meanness as much as it is in self-preservation. While only a small percentage of these guys may be prone to imminent violence, virtually all of them insist, in one way or another, that women owe them. Mockery, in this instance, isn't so much about being cruel as it is about publicly rejecting the Nice Guys' sense of entitlement to both sex and sympathy.
"Self-preservation", in this case, doesn't mean literal self-preservation, which might entail Hugo not bashing a bunch of potentially unstable, testosterone-poisoned young men who know how to use the internet and could be this close to a complete breakdown -- no, Hugo doesn't mind goading the desperate with no thought to his own safety and well-being. Brave of him. No, Hugo uses "self-preservation" in this context to mean "the preservation of the unfettered right of women and feminists to be hateful to young men because they disagree with their mating strategy and feel better when they creep-shame".
You see, if Nice Guys really did get laid like feminists have told you they would, then none of that stuff Hugo insists you need to get pussy would matter: physical appearance, social skills and positioning -- sorry, "attractiveness, charm and fuckability". You could really just be a Nice Guy, be a good listener, and the woman who is the object of your affections would naturally see you as a good mating possibility.
Only we all know that is complete and utter bullshit by now, and even Hugo admits that. Being a Nice Guy doesn't get you laid. So stop being a Nice Guy. Learn Game instead. Game gets you laid.
Wanna know just how much feminists despise you for being nice? Let's see what Hugo has to say:
Besides the near-universal sense that they've been unjustly defrauded, the great commonality among these Nice Guys is their contempt for women's non-sexual friendship. They rage about being "friendzoned," and complain about the hours spent listening to women without being given so much as a hand job in return for their investment.
So if you want to get in a chick's pants, stop trying to be friends with her. Stop listening to her. Stop treating her like you want to be her friend, because she won't fuck you anyway. Stop being nice, start being a dick, and learn Game.
Hugo complains that you Omega gentlemen are just upset that your "ruse" of being nice didn't work. In essence, he's calling you out for a "tactic" that feminism told you would work, and didn't. Most of you really do want to be Nice Guys, and are genuinely perplexed about the reaction; Hugo thinks you're all just faking it.
So quit faking it. Quit even trying to pretend to be Nice to women. They don't respect it, they don't desire it, and they don't fuck you for being nice. If you want to get fucked, learn Game. Game gets you laid.
Still not convinced? Hugo is so sure that you're a completely miserable waste of humanity that he thinks that you should be humiliated even more for the temerity of wanting to mate.
...a lonely dickwad is still a dickwad; the fact that these guys are in genuine pain makes them more rather than less likely to mistreat the women they encounter. A rage rooted in anguish is no less dangerous because it comes from the Great Big Sad Place. For that reason alone, we shouldn't make men's pain into women's problem to solve.
So solve your own problem: quit being nice to women. It's not going to get you laid and it's not even going to get you admired, at most it will get you pitied and used and at the least it's going to get you actively despised. So deal with your pain constructively: by learning Game and getting pussy. A lot of pussy. As much as you can, and then go back for more. Learn Game and then get pussy like it's on sale. Learn the intricacies of the Red Pill method of dating, and enter the Arena like the gladiator you are within. Utterly jettison the false ideology of feminism, which has made it clear that you have negative value, and embrace the pragmatic nature of the Manosphere. Rethink your mating strategy utterly, or continue to face the shame and humiliation feminism has in store for you.
If you are one of the unfortunate Omegas who got singled out for your shameful desire for human affection and erotic intimacy by Hugo and The Nice Guys of OK Cupid, remember Hugo's key point:
No One Is Entitled To Have Sex.
You don't get it handed to you. But if you can listen to some lame chick's fascinating story about the night of the Twilight premiere for two hours and then get rejected, then you can invest half that time learning Game and get far, far better results.
You have to be far more aggressive, far more assertive, and a WHOLE lot less "nice", and the pussy will start to come. No one is entitled to have sex.
You have to win it.
You may have to pay for it, lie for it, cheat for it, scheme and scam for it, but you aren't entitled to it. You may have to change your lifestyle and your life, your mode of dress and your method of approach, but you will be richer for it. You will have to ditch being a Nice Guy utterly -- so utterly, having female friends is unlikely to be fulfilling in the slightest. But that's okay -- until you are getting laid regularly, female friends are a luxury, not a necessity. And after you are getting laid regularly, female friends just complicate things.
The Red Pill observable fact is that you are not entitled to have sex, you have to WIN it. You have to make a herculean effort and be willing to say and do just about anything. You have to understand how female sexual psychology works and how to exploit it ruthlessly and utterly to fulfill your own goals. This is no place for Nice Guys, or just Being Yourself. That's a loser's game, and in this Arena, losers like that get held up for humiliation on a grand scale. When it comes to women, you, my poor friends, have no hope against the cunning Alphas in the world . . . or anyone who knows anything about Game.
Hugo is right about that. You have to win sex. It's a competition, and as in any competitive endeavor there are winners and losers. Winners get pussy. Losers get public humiliation and bullying ridicule by human Manginas like Hugo. Do you really want to get heckled by a dickwad like Hugo because you can't jettison your childhood dreams of true love and respectful relationships with women? Or do you want to get laid? Think about that very carefully.
Because as Hugo also points out, most women aren't going to do shit to help you out, either. You aren't "their problem". Your pain isn't worthy of their consideration, and your very existence inspires their contempt. The intense desire you feel for human companionship and intimate embraces disgusts them and they want to actively punish you for it. How DARE you not be Mr. Perfect? NO PUSSY FOR YOU, MR. NICE GUY!
The fact is, Gentlemen, you have been criminally misinformed your entire life about how male-female relations actually work. Feminism has promoted the ideal of sexual equality while ruthlessly exploiting the hypergamous freedom for women our society provides. YOU, being merely male, don't count as anything but a steaming pile they can congratulate each other for wiping off of the heel of their sensible pumps.
Being Nice almost never gets you laid, and anecdotal evidence to the contrary is statistically insignificant. If that sounds too cynical for you, then either invest heavily in honest prostitution, porn, or the priesthood, or STFU. That's the observable reality of the mating universe: the Sexual Market Place is a competition for mating. For pussy. And no one is entitled to pussy.
You have to WIN it.
Game is the roadmap to how you win. Game gets you laid. Feminism is a guaranteed strategy for male unhappiness and how to lose.
If you take nothing else away from Hugo's screed, then remember that feminism wants to see you humiliated for being a sexual loser, and the Manosphere wants to see you getting pussy like a rock star, no matter what you look like or where you work. Learn Game, and let the Omega melt away. Dudes don't count to the ladies of Jezebel some of whom wish to see everything with an XY chromosome safely neutered or eliminated all together.
But dudes DO count in the Manosphere, and no matter how clueless and misguided you might be, we want to see all of the Betas-and-Below thrive in a land teeming with easily-available pussy for you. We want you to learn Game, and then go forth and start scoring like a power forward.
What is Game? In a nutshell, Game is a recently-developed approach to dating, mating, and reproduction that focuses on the observable realities of modern courtship (not the zany and ridiculous ideals promulgated by feminism) with the stated desire to secure a sexual partner through conscious and clever use of evolutionary biology, psychology, and social manipulations Game is, essentially, the distilled essence of hundreds of committed Pick Up Artists who have rendered the art of panty-dropping to a learnable science.
And being "nice" to women is pretty much the easiest way to fuck that up. Why? Ever notice how hot girls never date Nice dudes, but always date complete Dicks? Game teaches you how to be a complete Dick . . . or at least fake it well enough to get pussy.
NOTE FROM FEMINISM: NICE GUYS DO NOT DESERVE PUSSY!
So, where to start? For a younger man, read and absorb everything you can from RooshV and Roissy/Chateaue Heartiste. Add in Rollo Tomossi's Iron Rules, skim Mystery's method, and keep exploring. For advanced students, consider Athol Kay's Married Man Sex Life and the Private Man's blog, both in the Blog Roll, which dispense invaluable advice for the older man in the dating universe.
The Red Pill is the answer to your problems, Gentlemen, not the humiliation you are receiving at the hands of the likes of Hugo. Get pissed. Get mad. Get mean. Stop being nice to women. Learn Game and get laid.